Heart:

I don't want to say it's because I'm Chinese or Asian but I was raised, taught, and even pressured to use my head, use my brain, and do what's smart.

The first thing I aspired to be was an artist, my mom's response was, "Artists don't make money. You are going to starve to death".

I grew up believing that following my heart is irrational and I am afraid of it.

Even after college I felt conflicted because I was debating between law school and going to school for shoe design. I did neither because of how torn I felt by that conflict and battle of the rational brain vs irrational heart.

Being a camgirl makes me feel liberated. The privates I have done, feeling like I am in a safe place to express myself without judgement or the possibility of someone I know watching me in public chat, makes me feel not only adored for all of who I am, but honest and true to myself.

Someone once told me, "You know you are doing the right thing when your head and heart agree".

This job is one of the few choices I have made and keep making on behalf of how I feel: my heart. My head questions my decision from time to time, or sometimes all the time. but my heart is always been with camming.

To anyone else that can empathize with how I feel, I try to remind myself that "I sincerely doubt that people have regrets about following their heart."

I feel this way because I know I am an old soul. I've experienced more than many because of my desire and recklessness to explore. I have lost the only person in this world I knew for sure that loved me unconditionally. The love my grandpa had for me, the look in his eyes, I will spend my life to find it again and I'm grateful I had the courage to tell him that before he passed.

My mom is my role model because of her strength and independence. The things I have experienced in my life, they have conditioned me to be "strong when all is wrong". I think it's about time for me to trust my own strength. I tell myself to let some of my guards down so I can be open to new people without judging them based on the actions of others in my past because I know the amount of emotional pain I can endure.

There's been change because I have felt the change, but it's been hard to express until now.

I know I keep saying this but I am unable to achieve any of it without the tippers that have supported me financially because you enable me to keep on this path.

I love my tippers because I am starting to love myself, truly appreciate my life, and I couldn't have done this without you and your generosity. Thank you.